Author Archives: Spanner Spencer


About Spanner Spencer

Yep, Spanner's his real name, and he's already heard that joke you just thought of. Although Spanner's not very good, he's quite fast, and that seems to be enough to keep him in a regular supply of free games and away from the depressing world of real work.

'Real Boxing' Review – Packs Some Serious Punch

Boxing is all about endurance. A truly great fight is a demonstration of that endurance; the fighters’ stamina, the punches they take, getting up from the mat, and their ability to still deliver a hit when they’re so exhausted that even their earlobes ache...

The Dark Passenger is definitely not to everyone’s taste. The celebration of murder and violence that permeates the Dexter TV show and books can turn both the stomach and head of those who don’t share a guilty desire to see brutal justice administered with the edge of a razor blade, so Dexter the Game 2 [$0.99] was always going to have a limited audience...

Like so many of the most ingenious gaming concepts, the endless runner is so simple and effective that it’s hard – if not impossible – to bring anything fresh to the concept once it’s been out there in the digital wild for a little while...

I sometimes wonder if we play Monopoly more out of habit, or some sense of nostalgic obligation, rather than because we actually want to. There’s barely a half-functioning family in the world that doesn’t have some kind of annual board game tradition, and at some point during the year we all give Monopoly a dusting off and joke, between yawns, about how great it’d be if this were real money...

I don’t know about you, but all I can think about when I mow someone down or blow someone away in Payback² [$4.99 / $79.99] is Jesse Ventura as Blaine in the movie Predator throwing back the cover of his minigun, spitting out his chewing tobacco (real nasty habit he’s got there) and delivering that immortal one-liner, “Payback time!”..

It makes you wonder sometimes how a developer decides which franchises to remake. Not that 1999’s Re-Volt for the PC and consoles of the day is less deserving of a remake than any other game, but I can’t help asking why this one, and why now?..

I distinctly remember playing Zaxxon in the arcades, although I’m now a bit shocked to discover it was 1982. What I remember most about Zaxxon isn't so much its amazing graphics, but rather a vague sense of bewilderment as I tried to wrap my head around its pseudo 3D controls...

When I was a kid, all we had to entertain ourselves with were 8-bit computers. None of your new fangled on-the-line multi-gamer consoles. Handheld game systems only had blurry black and white screens, but we were thankful for them! Oh yes...

I suppose it’s hard not to attract comparisons to the Aliens franchise when you pit a futuristic gun-heavy Marine against mindless, scurrying xenomorphic drones. The latest ad- and IAP-supported title from French studio Bulkypix revels in this comparison, though. It dives head first into oozing pools of acidic alien blood and splashes around playfully while shooting a pulse rifle in the air and yelling “Let’s rock!” over thudding gunfire sound effects...