Family Guy is one of those shows you either love or hate. You love its humor, whether it’s offensive or not, with some pretty memorable characters (Greased Up Naked Deaf Guy? C’mon). Or you hate it, think it’s stupid, and can’t understand how a show like that is on the air. Whatever your view, Family Guy is here to stay, and Seth McFarlane is one of the biggest people in the industry at the moment.

Which pains me to say that, as a huge fan of not only the show but of McFarlane himself, Family Guy: The Quest for Stuff [Free] is quite a boring, slow game filled with aggressive IAP badgering. The story is stupid (in a good way) and falls in line perfectly with the show: Peter and the Chicken get into a fight that culminates in the destruction of Quahog, and it’s up to you to rebuild the town.

First, the good. The Quest for Stuff looks very good. TinyCo has done an amazing job modeling Quahog. Houses look like they do in the show, all the way down to minor details like the little mesh sheen on the solarium part of the Griffin’s home. If a building is animated in the show, it’s animated here, such as the sign at the top of The Drunken Clam. The music that plays throughout is the Family Guy theme, as well as some music heard throughout various episodes of the series. There is very little voice acting in the game. Aside from the introductory cinematic and the quips they say when you tap them, the majority of the quests are delivered through speech bubbles, sans the speech.

FamGuy2

TinyCo has gone a long way with the fan service here. Aside from the multitude of buildings (like McBurger Town, The Founding Father Restaurant and James Woods High), bits of various episodes have made their way in, as well as characters. Greased Up Naked Deaf Guy, Herbert the Pervert, Bonnie, Jerome, Mort, Mr. Pewterschmidt, to name but a few. You can buy objects like the Golden Pool, the Hindenpeter, Petercopter, Wanna-Bang-Oh, even Crippletron. If it’s remotely memorable from the show, it’ll be in the game.

The game contains FaceSpace, which is TinyCo’s take on Facebook, that acts as a collection of characters. When you unlock a character, they’ll appear in FaceSpace, with a profile appropriate to them. For example, Quagmire has status updates of “One day ago: Checked in  at Quahog Motel”, followed by “One hour ago: Checked in at Quahog Hospital.” As each character levels up, occasional rewards will be a new FaceSpace post, in addition to new items or actions.

Yes, characters themselves level up. You level up as normal by collecting items and completing missions, but characters do too. Every time a character levels, they’ll gain access to a new action, a new costume that needs to be built at Al Harrington’s (apparently he’s no longer a Wacky Waving Inflatable Arm Flailing Tube Man), and more. You can unlock Hooker Peter, Twerked Out Peter, Speedo Quagmire, and more. You can tap a character and then select an action, or if an action requires interacting with something, like Chris with a bed of flowers, you can drop the character onto the item to perform the action.

If you remember from one of the episodes, you can enter the Multiverse that Stewie has found, which is basically you visiting neighbors, performing actions for coins, XP and sometimes clams, before returning to your own Quahog.

FamGuy4

With the good out of the way, we sadly have to come to the bad.

Similar to The Simpsons: Tapped Out [Free], The Quest for Stuff is loaded with IAP, and most of the fun and fancy buildings will require clam shells, the premium currency. Unlike the aforementioned game, though, you are constantly badgered, directly and indirectly, to purchase clams. One of the first missions tasks you with buying a $4.99 IAP of coins, and they’ll give you $4.99 of clams as a bonus. Unlocking characters requires you to perform tasks with others, and while not being a required action, one of them is to perform a task by a character only available from a premium item purchase. You’ll be pestered often by Stewie, who doesn’t unlock for a while, to buy clams. If you buy this building now for 600 clams, we’ll give you those 600 clams right back! Sounds like a good deal, but still requires money. Prices are at least on par with similar titles.

After the first four or so quests, you’re immediately put into long action times. I played the game for nary a half hour when one of the missions that popped was to make Bonnie go to ladies night, which carries a ridiculously long timer. It’s okay though, you can speed it up. Want to buy some clams? Because of the constantly long action times, the game is very slow paced. I’ve been playing for hours, and still have only three districts unlocked because of the timers.

The game can be offensive, especially when it comes to Mort and Jerome, but that’s expected based on the humor of the show. If you’re offended by what some characters say in the show, you’ll be offended here.

Family Guy: The Quest for Stuff may appeal to fans of the show; it’s hard to say with certainty that if you like the show, you’ll like the game. The humor and styling of the show is here, and there is a ridiculous amount of fan service to be had, but it’s ultimately a very slow paced game, with aggressive and constant prompts to buy clams, and more waiting around than actually playing. And for those reasons, I simply can't recommend it.

It makes me not want to dance the shipoopi, but to call my mom and complain. Mom. Mom. Mom. Mommy! Mommy! Mommy! Mama! Mama! Mama! Ma! Ma! Ma! Ma! Mum! Mum! Mum! Mum! Mummy! Mummy! Mumma! Mumma! Mumma!

TouchArcade Rating

StarStarNoneNoneNone
  • JC85

    ooooohhhhhhh mmmmm aaaaaaa, totally saw this one coming

    • Ahmed90

      Too bad the hoi polloi won't pass on this game. They gobble up everything "free, free, fweeeee"

  • 5hift

    When I saw the screenshots I thought this game was gonna be something like South Park's The Stick of Truth. Instead FOX just trolls all of us and makes a lame The Simpsons Tapped Out reskin.

    • markymarkanddafunkybunch

      Those damn right wingers. I should know, I have a keyboard and am really smrt

      • markymarkanddafunkybunch

        The game really does suck though. I was referring to the k street trolls who couldn't talk rationally about the prohibiting of the reviews before the launch. Regardless of whether you agreed if it was right or wrong, I HATE political speak everywhere I look. It's disgusting.

      • Purohan Pirilu

        Fox as a whole is more complex than, and not as easily dismissible as "right wing" as FoxNews and 5hift was clearly venting at the entertainment branch of Fox. So, political speak was in the eye of the beholder on this one.

  • Jzracin

    All yall folks that bitched and moaned cuz fox accidentally released it early then revoked it said yall wouldn't download it i bet yall had that shit on watch and downloaded it as soon as it hit the market itll probably be number one on the store

    • C. Stubb

      The users here represent a minuscule minority of all the people who actually download games off of the App Store. (Even more so for freemium games such as this.) Whether your premise is valid or not is inconsequential; your conclusion is patently false. If this game reaches #1, it will have very little to do with the users here at TouchArcade, whether they choose to download it or not.

      • Jake7905

        Well said. Though I didn't download this game, it was hardly surprising to see it rise on the charts. Even if every member of TA boycotted every freemium game released, it wouldn't effect their popular appeal.

    • Xexist

      I dont doubt you are right for some, however didnt and will never download it, and I LOVE the show. (Debacle aside though, i also hate IAP)

    • mclifford82

      Nope.

    • Based Xatu

      This isn't English.

    • Zerol3onheart

      The lack of punctuation is just amazing.

  • mzinn

    Instabuy......i mean instaPASS

  • dthought

    The review is totally spot on. I would also like to add that it is slow in all senses of the word and the reward system is pitiful. One hour to earn 10 coins is very little payback. I like that you need two characters to work on some quests. I'm sticking with it though because I like the show and I enjoy this genre of games.

  • ImJPaul

    While the IAP is aggressive and a bit unfair, I don't think the game is boring as long as it's used the way it's intended to be used. Load it up every few hours for 10-20 minutes, collect your xp, money and clams and save up for the next purchase. I'm enjoying it personally but it all depends on the person, I suppose.

    • {SQUEEK}

      I think 2 stars is pretty harsh. 3 average is ok.

      People need to atop complaining about paying cash for iap games. you dont have to buy anything if you don't want to.

      Also saying the simpsons did it... Is true because almost every game in the app store is recycled game.

      • HalfnHalfCoffeeJelly

        IAP is also usually for fluff stuff but this game makes quests out of premium characters. Plus, with The Simpsons you aren't restricted to building one building at a time due to a CoC worker system.

        Its it presentation that people are complaining about not paying cash. Its like your Dad telling you your dead dog is at an upstate farm vs saying the Vet killed your dog.

      • {SQUEEK}

        The Simpsons has many bldg and characters for "donuts" and get those donuts very slowly.

        About not able to build things fast or missions.... Why is everyone is such a hurry? People complain like this is the only game they play.

        Also the biggest people that are commenting are ones that say "i dont like iap games", so they are already coming in with negative attitude.

        Like it or not iap games are not going away.

      • Bool Zero

        No game should hang on the premise of not allowing you to play it. That's not game design, that's Vegas slot machine psychology at work. When you can barely touch on the "gameplay" (and I use that term loosely here, as these are not games despite their adamant advertising as such) in about 30 minutes and then are hit with a heavy timer pushing you away, it doesn't make for a game people are going to want to return to, period. Perhaps some are okay with playing a game for 5-10 minutes every few hours, but for the rest of us that's not playing anything, that's called checking in and becoming a chore.

        No game should start to feel like a chore in order to play it... But that's exactly what happens when you put aggressive timers so early in in a game like this. The complaints on IAP currency are justified if they are used in such an aggressive way as to the games design and actually fun content being locked out from a player, especially at such early levels. When you encounter quests that demand you use premium currency so early in (like the first 15 minutes or so), I think people are justified to complain.

        There is freemium done right and then there is freemium done like this. A line has to be drawn as to what is acceptable with developers. Nothing should get a blanket "oh, it's okay and if you don't like it just play a different game in the mean time" pass when games like these are do spectating the trends on the AppStore. After all, it's our money they want, we should still hold the right to dictate how they get it. If freemium truly is here to stay, then we as consumers reserve the right to complain and dictate at least how that freemium is implemented and how aggressive and intrusive we will tolerate it. It's not simple enough to just "not download it" when the general AppStore consumer consists of the uninformed with a Apple account can just download it off of brand recognition alone and 5star the game before even playing it, or worse to play it for 5 minutes and never again. That 5 star review stays no matter how much or little they play the game. The AppStore rating system can't be trusted to weed these things out especially when you have recognizable properties like this that will be blind downloaded and up reviewed on recognition alone.

      • {SQUEEK}

        Your point is valid but i do not agree with it.

        This is a farming/city game. They have timers. Everyone i ever play has timers. Long ones too.

        The money quest is just a quest you dont have to play. Every iap game has that right away wether its a quest or better armor/weapons.

        I agree it shouldn't be 4 or 5 stars but it shouldn't be 2. Its an average game. Not below average.

      • Intendro

        "About not able to build things fast or missions.... Why is everyone is such a hurry? People complain like this is the only game they play."

        Because unsurprisingly (yet surprising to the developers of these games), we actually want to PLAY a GAME. Timers are stupid, and apparently they're getting into some premium games too. We're doomed.

        *looks up Family Guy lyrics*
        "But where are those good old fashioned values
        on which we used to rely?"
        Ironic, huh? :p

      • Intendro

        I have no idea why my comment's line breaks aren't showing up when viewed from the TA app.

      • DoctorFedora

        Amusingly enough, South Park already got to "The Simpsons did it first" first.

      • {SQUEEK}

        Yup thats why i said it and if south park had an ipa i would be playing that also. Even better maybe a venture bros one.

  • Jake7905

    No surprise that 'Freemium Guy: The Quest for Currency' is a critical bomb. If only the App Store masses would stop supporting these cash grabs......

  • Hiraether

    Al Harrington’s (apparently he’s no longer a Wacky Waving Inflatable Arm Flailing Tube Man)"
    He was the salesman of several different overstocked items... Not the tube man itself. Lolol!

    • Hiraether

      That's Darth Harrington to you..
      ( T_T)\(^-^ )

  • Corky McButterpants
  • Eseres

    If you don't want to take the reviewers word for it, take mine. This games WAS fun for a little while, but now it sucks. The IAP's and timers really kills this game, and its absolutely NOT worth wasting your time!

    I usually HATE these IAP's and timers, but my weakness for The Family Guy show made me want to try it. All this game did for me was to make me hate IAP's and timers even more than I did before...

    • Corky McButterpants

      Yeah. This gives me the sads.
      Trials Frontier is doing this to me right now. :(

      If they'd just give us some respect and offer a >BUY OPTION<.

    • falco

      Sad you just realise it now ?

  • markymarkanddafunkybunch

    They wanted it to be a secret for launch day because they wanted everyone to realize collectively, how much it blows.

  • Themostunclean

    This game was made for one reason. Fox knew how much cash "Tapped Out" was raking in and wanted another cow to milk.

    Just remember that this wasn't the first Family Guy game on the App Store, "Time Warped" was actually a fun little (premium) platformer from a few years ago. Unfortunately it's not available anymore or I'd recommend fans of the series go buy that instead.

  • falco

    Just the name I know its sht game, I don't have have to ask. Its funny because people will still waste their times and money on this game congrats to you.

  • Boris Nguetie

    now its confirmed! toucharcade is the only mobile gaming website with legit reviews!

  • Ace43

    @jzracin I for one said I wouldn't download it solely for their response to the early release. And guess what I didn't do? I didn't download it. Never will.

  • icruise

    I'm not too impressed with the game either. I like Family Guy, but I think the reason Tapped Out has been successful is that people have a lot of affection for the characters that have been around for 20+ years. Also, they don't pester you to make purchases all the time -- it's actually possible to play the game and enjoy it without ever making a purchase. I also see a huge amount of variation in people's town designs, and that's a big part of the draw for me. That doesn't seem to be possible with this game (but to be fair, it's just launched so maybe that will come in the future).

    For the record, I have a lot of complaints about Tapped Out as well (ridiculously high prices for premium items being only one). But so far it definitely seems to be the better of the two.

  • KoRoV

    And what did you ecpacted these days :/

  • Illuminerdy

    One of the worst written reviews I have ever read; this game was made for this review.

  • DeLtAg1An9O

    Men, its kinda sad that it isn't a good, because I am a huge Family Guy fan

  • razrie

    My biggest gripe is the sound problem I have where resuming it sometimes won't let sounds play. But beyond that I think it's a fun game, designed to be played in small bursts throughout the day.

    I was on tapped out since release and I feel people aren't remembering the game right. It was just as slow with Bad bugs, and was actually pulled from the store to be fixed. I do like unlocking chars and costumes more than tapped out, and the char all have more visual variety in their jobs. I feel they do more around the town then the tapped out chars do. Since sto I feel keeps chars indoors for most. Let alone the fact that I've found family guy to be funny while I feel tapped out just isn't funny. It's interesting but rarely funny

  • anabolicMike

    I loved family guy. Then it kinda started feeling repetitive. I can't believe I'm saying it but it did. They killed off Brian for some stupid Bronx Wop dog for no apparent reason. Well maybe a liberal spouting tree hugger dog was hard to take but it was awesome when he tried to unf Lois. Hah! Again though, the humour started feeling repetitive and forced. Some episodes were plain bad and others simply preaching. I stopped watching it. Nothing at all has been able to do what the Simpsons has done. That's still not boring and old and it's been on FOReVER! What has that got to do a with the game? Nothing! I didn't even try it and won't hah

  • Eric Behney

    Even if this got 5 stars there's no way in hell I would've ever downloaded it.

  • KillerScoregasm™

    I would pay a decent premium for a full featured game, without timers and iAp's, especially if it were a Family Guy themed Sim City style game. I have it and as much as I want to love the game because of my love for the show as this game is pretty, it is pretty much a waste of time, MONEY (I love the fact that when you spend $99 on an in game purchase that doesn't even give you unlimited coins, tokens, tickets, clams, bucks, or whatever they label their thief like ways), space, and bandwidth (why do I have to have an internet connection to play a game?). Unfortunately, this is where the Video Game Industry is headed as whole. I seriously miss NES/Sega days, where if you had a buddy over you didn't have to have a subscription to play 2 player co-op or have to pay $.99 to get Mario a mushroom or how the Dev's created masterpiece's and not trademark the word "candy"..

  • Honky Lips

    HEM IN ReVeRse

  • DoctorFedora

    Look at the bright side: the wait times are just the right length to match Family Guy's patented "keep hammering away at the joke over and over until it fits however much time the episode ran short by" moments.

  • DolphinsRuleAll

    Tried it, and I'd have to concur with the general idea of the article. Visually, it's good. It fails at almost every other category, though. At the end of the day, if you have no intention of "shelling" out money for clams, there is very little point, and you will be disappointed with how quickly the novelty wears off. Like, almost instantly.

  • Oktoba77

    Accurate review. Sticking with game now as I'm a big FG fan but unless serious updates and improvements occur soon I dare say I will tire of this title and no clams will be purchased before that!

  • Kevin McCarty

    I use a hack for Family Guy: The Quest for Stuff which gave me unlimited coins, clams, double XP and more. Here it is: g4mehacks. com/family-guy-quest-for-stuff-hack/

Family Guy: The Quest for Stuff Reviewed by James Paterson on . Rating: 2