904067_largerI accidently recommended the endearingly terrible World Of Aircraft , [Free] to a very good friend, and I kinda feel okay about it. I was...blinded by ambition. In an effort to make a good impression here at TouchArcade, I gobbled up World of Aircraft with gusto and told my friends about it sight-unseen. I should have figured something was fishy when noticing the release notes’ less than familiar association with spelling, grammar and punctuation marks. However, it is safe to say that World of Aircraft’s tutorial level is the most unintentionally hilarious use of the English language in a video game since “All your base are belong to us”. The icing on the cake? The Tommy Wiseau level enthusiasm for its misappropriated text.

The game itself doesn’t seem that bad, if maybe hastily produced. You control a plane with swipes on the left, and on the right you get a sniper shot, shotgun shot, and machine gun for your dogfighting needs. The control is decent, diving can feel a bit loose, and there’s no way to loop around your enemy ala Star Fox, your only evasive maneuver being a dramatic high altitude shift activated via a double tap on the right of your screen. But, World of Aircraft certainly has the potential to be a fun little diversion to be enjoyed ironically. Or if you believe the folks on the forums, it's objectively bad - to which I say, a little junk food never hurt anyone.

9HmYyFN wnS3JpC

But, guys, no one seems to be playing it. I have yet to get into a multiplayer game, and have found no one willing to brave the slam poetry of the tutorial. I can’t say with much authority that this is .99 cents well spent, but somehow I doubt you’ll regret it, and if enough folks buy it, maybe some of us who have already (accidently) purchased the game, can play too. As long as the developer games promises to never hire a translator, they may just gained a lifelong fan.

  • Dams

    "Or if you believe the folks on the forums, it's objectively bad - to which I say, I don't want to recognize my review was wrong."

    Fixed for you.

  • Dueler

    So you hope to draw other players by telling us its basically crap with some funny engrish.
    Seriously, No thank's.

    I however see this whole article as "I made a mistake, now I'm trying to pretend it was serendipity while giving no supporting evidence.

    • Sanuku

      Folks it`s an "First Impressions" and since the Reviewer seem to be totally new to the hole iOS World you should at least give him a chance.

      • Dueler

        But my reply was constructive.

      • mr ed209

        Being new to reviewing iOS games on the leading iOS game review site is no excuse whatsoever. In fact, that person should surely be making double sure they don't embarrass themselves this way, no?

      • PureRumble

        How much (or should i say "little" to make my point clear) do you think they pay him to write this article for you?

      • Chester_Copperpot

        I always thought not being full of crap was its own incentive.

      • Protoman

        I guess it depends on whether TA is a news sight or just a blog. If it's just a blog than really it's not a big deal. In fact it's a pretty funny story. If TA is a news sight however, than it's a pretty poor excuse for a news story. I'll just sit back and let TA decide what they are.

      • gedd25

        It's site.

      • Illuminerdy

        No. Where was his statement of criteria when evaluating the game? What is so funny about broken English in 2013? I will compliment this guy's diction throughout the article—it was humorous, candid—but I honestly learned nothing about this game.

  • http://www.onebagtravel.com/ OneBagTravel

    Oh hi Mark!

    • ibmurai

      "I have cancer!"
      "Don't worry about it."

      (Worst movie ever. So much fun :) )

      • Paul Meekin

        Yes!

  • Greyskull

    I don't need to be fluent in an Asian language; I can usually decipher the developers' intent. One could make a fortune offering cheap, basic Engrish-to-English translation services. For 5 bucks an app, I'll un-googlify your app-descriptions and tutorial text. There must be thousands of apps that could be retranslated from Google Translate to English in about 3 minutes.

    • ptdshiznit818

      Still though, that's supposed to be a tutorial screen right? Now I know that there isn't anything really important in those screens and I'm sure it ends up explaining the game to you just fine but what's the point of having stupid ass sentences like that in the game at all. They aren't funny, just plain sad.

  • mr ed209

    So let me get this right, in an effort to impress your colleagues at TA, which I'm presuming is a new job for you?, you recommended with enthusiasm a game you hadn't played properly and is in fact crap.

    Sounds like a lot of TA reviews, to be honest. I think you'll fit in there incredibly well.

    • http://twitter.com/try2bcool69 Jay G

      Wow, you really are being a dick for no reason. Go somewhere else and get your info then. Try IGN, you'd fit right in there with that attitude.

      • Chester_Copperpot

        Did he say something untrue?

      • Chester_Copperpot

        Edit: Nevermind, sorry. I completely overlooked his last two sentences somehow.

  • laszlo_kovacs

    This site has fallen a long way since I first got an iPhone a year and a half ago. Reviews are now untrustworthy, inconsistent. They're also few and far between given how many games are released for the platform, and with most reviews it is glaringly obvious not much time was spent with the game before delivering a final verdict.

    And stuff like this is just a waste of space; the author can't decide what point he/she wants to make. This inner dialogue rambling is better left in the head.

    & Hi, doggy!

    • http://www.artofadambetts.com/ Adam Betts

      Sorry to hear about your sense of humor accident the other day.

      I enjoyed a junk article like this from time to time, it mixes things up. It's sad how whiny readers can be these day. Loosen up :)

  • pugbot

    Accidentally*

    • xx99

      The whole last sentence-and-a-half is Engrish. I am giving him the benefit of the doubt and hoping that "accidently" was intentional.

  • xx99

    Personally, I adored this game. Great buy at 99 cents, if that goes up it'll be too steep. Come in with the proper expectations: this is a goofy arcade aerial fighter, not a sim.

    People are giving up on it too quickly. I won't pretend there aren't glaring mistakes here, but there's some great stuff too: the music is phenomenal, the explosions are gorgeous, and the multiplayer is intense. Plus blowing a plane out of the air with a shotgun feels so satisfying (possibly to do with that explosive eye candy).

    The single player is repetitive, but it does get hard (I'm currently taking on missions that put me against 11 bots, the number keeps climbing) and you'll get better both in skill and by buying other planes. Getting good enough to finally beat a really hard mission feels good.

    The game is indeed, objectively bad overall... but at 99 cents, I think we can focus on the good parts and cut a first-time developer some slack.

    • B30

      Why should somebody pay 99c for an overall bad game, when there're so many good games out there (for the same price)???

      • xx99

        Eh, I like trying new things every now and then. Maybe "objectively bad" was unfair. The core gameplay is fun, it's just shallow. If something that costs me 99 cents can be entertaining for 1 or 2 hours, I'm satisfied. I don't need every game I play to be a masterpiece.

  • Bazel

    I have been excited about a game and recommended it many times. Sometimes I put my foot in my mouth. I like that you were excited and note afraid to speak your mind.

  • JBRUU

    I have to point it out - ".99 cents" is actually 99% of 1 cent. It would be "99 cents" or "$.99".

    Other than that, fun article.

  • Morgan01

    "I accidentally recommended the terrible endearing World of Airplanes"

    • Morgan01

      "Told my friends about it sight-unseen". Sorry, but how can you write an article or review and recommend a game "sight-unseen"? Game reviews are suppose to be unbiased opinions of experiences with a particular game. It is concerning to hear that articles, and possibly reviews, are being written with no exposure to the game in question.

      On the other hand, we appreciate the honesty and coming forward to admit and try to rectify the issue.

  • witedahlia

    Your first paragraph drew me in, I think it's refreshing (and funny) to see someone admit they screwed up because I can relate. Probably most people can. However, after the first paragraph I think you should have turned it around somehow. Tell us why it's worth 99 cents or why you regret ever recommending it, etc.

    Just offering what I hope is constructive feedback.

    • Chester_Copperpot

      It's cool to admit you aren't perfect, rather than jump for a person's jugular at the first opportunity. The thing is, though, he can't accidentally make a conscious decision; the concept of free will depends on it.

      But, I second your criticism. The article wanders and never arrives at a point.

  • WoeOfAftermath

    Wow, so many ignorant comments on this article, I'm not going to waste my time responding to them individually. I've been following TA since the beginning. It started out as a blog and, in my opinion, has always been a blog. Yes they offer review scores but that was only because of pressure from the community. They were VERY reluctant to start giving review scores. That's because this is a group of people who love iOS gaming, and not everyone who plays games on the platform is a "gamer". In other words, their reviews attempt to give readers a subjective look at what each game has to offer, and ultimately they let the readers decide if its something they might enjoy. Developers are always finding new ways to take advantage of the platform, and even games that might not be "good" by some people's standards, are still worth consideration if they try something new or are campy in just the right way.

    Their star rating system isn't based on any pre-determined set of qualities (graphics, sound, game length, controls, replay value, etc.) and instead attempts to provide an overall impression of their experience. The author of this article never posted a "proper" review, so I'm not sure why so many people are acting like they were deceived. If you're not into hilariously bad games, don't buy it. I for one appreciate reading the vast majority of articles on here because all of the writers bring something different to the table. To say that their reviews have become "inconsistent" is a moot point as far I'm concerned. If you want to read more subjective reviews, go some place like 148 Apps where the reviews have absolutely no personality.

    Yes this writer is new, and CONSTRUCTIVE criticism is great. But the fact that TA is hiring new writers means that they want to provide us with more coverage. This article never claimed to be a review, and sharing one's own personal experience with gaming on iOS is what this site is all about.

    • Chester_Copperpot

      Blanket posts addressing an undefined group of people always seem like tilting at windmills to me. Were you looking to discuss something, or just get it off your chest?

      • WoeOfAftermath

        I guess I was just venting, TBH. But this is a place that I come to every day and I was sitting there, excited to have some weekend articles to read. I thought this article was quirky and entertaining, and I was happy to see that TA has added new writers and weekend articles. So when I saw people crapping all over it, I guess got really annoyed!

    • Greyskull

      Personally, having been here from the beginning, I always thought the point of TA was the community (and its forums). Regardless of the quality (or lack thereof) of the reviews, TA will only remain significant if the forums do.

      • WoeOfAftermath

        Fair enough. I don't post in the forums frequently but, you're right, the community is an integral part of the experience here. I guess that's why I was defending the writer; this has always been a welcoming place and I feel like I know people here, even if I've never directly addressed them. I'm just happy to see TA growing and this article had a human element that most TA articles have. I like that about this place and I have respect for the writers, even when they just want to tell us an anecdote about an iOS game.

    • http://iqsoup.com/ iqSoup

      Good points all around!

  • mosquito60

    "A little junk food never hurt anyone." But if you expect a french four star meal, you won't be happy when the waiter serves you a charred sausage instead. It's called fraud.

  • tpianca

    If the tutorial s funny because of broken English, you could make a video and post it to the site, with comments. I would watch it. But I won't buy a game, even a .99 one, because the tutorial is badly translated.