Do not buy these. Just don't. Not even for a laugh. Not even because they're only a couple bucks a pop and what harm could it do? I am sitting here trying to imagine how these ports of the 8-bit Mega Man games could have been worse, and I'm coming up dry. Nothing is right about them. Nothing. It's like someone was given the graphic and audio assets of the games and were told to re-create everything else on their own. The gravity is off. Enemy behavior is off. Hit detection is weird, and even the recoil from getting hit doesn't work properly. The games are crash-prone. The framerate is awful. The default speed is absurdly slow and choppy, and while the faster speed setting makes things a little better, it's too fast, still choppy, and messes with the games' fundamental workings even more.

shaunmusgrave_2017-jan-04

The UI is awkward, and some original background assets are gone. Background layers aren't working correctly, and things that are meant to be hidden or obscured by foreground objects just cruise right in front of them, no big deal. Oh, and yes, the touch controls are about as bad as some feared, and there is no MFi controller support. Friends, I pine for the halcyon days when I thought that would be the worst issue with the ports of these games.

photo-2017-01-05-13-08-45

Frankly, I'm baffled. These games run the gamut from 20 to 30 years old. The computer I owned in high school could emulate these games smoothly, and when I was in high school, Family Matters was still airing new episodes and The Simpsons was still good. Capcom has ported these games numerous times over the years to various degrees of success, but even the very least of those attempts is better than these. Just in the last couple of years we got beautiful versions of the games on an engine designed to be ported to multiple platforms. Why are the iOS versions of these games so utterly bad?

mm2

I just fired up the Beeline port of Mega Man 2 from several years ago to make sure I wasn't misremembering things, but no, that dreadful port runs circles around these hot disasters. I don't even know what more to write in this review. The sprites look good, I guess? The music hasn't been tampered with, though some of the sound effects are gone. They're cheap. The touch controls are not meaningfully worse than average, though that still makes getting through some of the tougher sections pretty hard. There are lots of new options to fiddle around with, and you have effectively infinite lives now, so you can continue as many times as you need to from each checkpoint. I'm clawing desperately for any nice things to say. Oh, there are optional difficulty settings for all of the games now instead of just the second game. Your progress is automatically saved after each level, too.

No, that's all I've got. Capcom should be ashamed at releasing anything in this state, let alone classics like these. I feel like I'm pretty open-minded when it comes to stuff like this, as I'm aware of the challenges each platform brings, but there's really no excuse for how utterly terrible these are. More or less a worst-case scenario. Do not buy these, even if you hate yourself. Self-harm is never an answer.

TouchArcade Rating

StarNoneNoneNoneNone
  • rhinofinger

    Sigh. I was really hoping they learned their lesson after that terrible Mega Man 2 port way back when. Nope. What a shame! Mega Man 6 was and still is one of my favorite games of all time.

  • http://twitter.com/JaredTA Jared Nelson

    So you're saying they're not very good?

    • Ponycakes

      Eh, I'm still not quite getting that vibe.

      • tubaros

        Me either. Ive just bought all of them as I just couldnt work out whether the reviewer liked them or not...

      • chief78

        Mooooooo!$$$$$

    • lezrock

      That's what I read between the lines.

    • https://plus.google.com/u/0/+SarahBPeters Gravydog316 (Sarah)

      The NES versions ARE better; these are hard to play with touch-screen. Download MM2 & MMX for iOS.

  • God's Grundle

    Still better than Super Mario Run, at least these games don't have an online requirement.

    • Cheeseball

      No. These are REALLY bad ports. Offline, yes. But gameplay and performance-wise? These need to be brought out back and shot.

      • God's Grundle

        It's no worse than turning Mario into an auto-runner that costs $10.

      • Cheeseball

        Super Mario Run is actually fun, even as an auto-runner, although I agree not worth $9.99. These Mega Man ports are really bad and not worth to time to even pirate them.

    • Stetch

      Like 4fps gameplay with slow controller. This is really bad ... Mario Run is a masterpiece in comparison.

    • Taylorian

      Mario Run was good and super fun. You only had to be connected upon the completion of a run.

      I suspect you have not played either game.

      • Intendro

        You only had to be connected every time you beat a stage? That's practically as bad as always!

      • Intendro

        And I tried the demo- you have to be connected to start it up too.
        No connection? The game is now broken.
        Bleh... Bleck!

      • Intendro

        Down-votes... it's like they're up-voting unnecessary Internet requirement for some reason.
        -
        I guess they didn't know the exclamation of disgust was a Super Paper Mario reference.
        And they interpreted it as rudeness... directed at them?
        Directed at the game they love?
        You have to be able to admit when something bad is in a thing you like. Makes no sense to try to defend every single aspect of it, including bad things...
        -
        And "the game is now broken" was an accurate statement.
        I meant while you have no connection, the game doesn't work: so it's now broken, intentionally even...
        ๐Ÿค•

      • God's Grundle

        Tell me about it, I can't believe people are defending Super Mario Run. It truly is the worst game on the App Store, and I've played some bad games.

      • Anthony

        Worst game on the app store? Credibility meet window...

      • Ivan

        Generational gap I suppose. Those games are great and I got the quote because I'm old.

        SMR was fun for what it was. When I first saw it was an auto runner, I didn't expect Super Mario 3D World out of it. The internet thing wasn't an issue for me as I don't commute using a train or anything. If I did, I'd have a totally different feeling about.

      • God's Grundle

        I played the first level, that was enough for me.

      • Taylorian

        Of Mario Run or Mega Man?

      • God's Grundle

        Super Mario Run.

  • Tizz986

    I think it's safe to say that Capcom won't be backing the patreon lol.

    Thanks for the quick and honest review. Saved me $2 that I would have used on the first one, I will send it you guys way instead ๐Ÿ˜‰

  • nkx

    I'm sad to read this but glad I didn't buy them after reading how badly ported they are

    • nkx

      Has capcom really dropped this bad. Really sad. I was hoping for it to run like mega man x I mean that isn't perfect but playable

  • macatron

    This is the kinda crap big gaming developers do that literally blows my mind. Capcom had a potential (easy) money maker with one of their best IPs. All the had to do was deliver a good quality port, and people would've downloaded these like crazy! Sega learned their lesson with their horrible ports of Sonic, and luckily they had Christian Whitehead step in to make that all work out. Capcom, on the other hand, seems to think that these are the kinds of experiences people expect on a mobile device. That being said, it's hard to believe that this is the same company that provided these same games years ago; albeit in a playable format. Way to let your Megaman fanbase down right out of the gates for 2017, Capcom! SMH

    • OrangutanKungfu

      What's Christian Whitehead doing right now? He available?

      Capcom will rightly get it in the neck for these ports, but the company has also done some good stuff too on iOS. Ghost Trick, Ace Attorney and, particularly, MHFU have all been translated superbly for mobile. Just a shame they couldn't have lavished that same due care and attention on Mega Man.

      • The Immortal Bryfang

        Whitehead is working on Sonic Mania right now, that dude has bigger fish to fry.

      • nini

        And bigger pay checks to chase.

  • Son of Anarchy

    The knowledge you've gained from years of reviewing is really shining through Shaun. Six classic birds where just expertly taken out with one single stone... pretty impressive. Thanks for the great read, and for saving me the cash.

  • bossjaja

    ok but: do u like them

    • lezrock

      Bahaha

  • Samhain666

    I left pretty much this same review on the app store and then went to the capcom mobile site and pasted in the same comments. I'm going to ask apple for a refund. I bought 1 & 2. Shoulda fired up 1 before I bought 2. I also fired up the beeline version and Shaun's right, it's way better than this trainwreck. I remember calling every Toys r us back when MM3 came out and driving 30 miles for it. I was hoping for a little nostalgic fun, but instead I got the gaming equivalent of someone rubbing ground up glass in my eyes.

  • macatron

    Excellent review and assessment! My favorite quote would have to be:

    "Do not buy these, even if you hate yourself. Self-harm is never an answer."

    In fact, I think you should've made that the title for the article. ๐Ÿ˜›

  • Shaun C

    Yikes. Must admit I'm morbidly curious about how they managed to screw up the framerate so badly. I guess it's one of life's little mysteries.

  • vic_viper_001

    The fact that something like this exists, makes me question my faith. Can a just God exist, and not violently ERADICATE the people responsible for this horrible abomination?

  • zergslayer69

    This game needs some whitehead loving and it'll become glorious!

  • https://www.facebook.com/rossmanbrothersgames RossmanBrosGames

    Weird! And a shame. Really doesn't make sense how someone in Capcom would approve this. Thanks for the warning Shaun I was planning on grabbing some of these. I didn't mind play the mega man x iOS version. Guess I may just grab one of the console collections now that I'm wanting to play these.

  • colbertj

    In other words, instabuy!!

  • TheGodless

    Glad I didn't buy any of these before I checked TA, but I could do without the bag on the Simpsons. It's become a cliche for people to bag on the Simpsons and nearly everyone that does either hasn't checked out the last few seasons or doesn't take into account how their own tastes and humor has changed as they have gotten older and how, just because they have changed, it doesn't mean that something they used to like now sucks. While I'd agree that the good episodes have gotten rarer, there continue to be gems in every season and every episode has at least a few funny moments. I'm kind of biased about the topic, but the issue I have had with the Simpsons is that, depending on who is writing, Homer can be religious one episode and entirely irreligious the next.

    • Tychaeus

      aha..gimme a break 'eye rolls.'

      Back on topic...Thanks so much for saving me some cash! I swear I can hardly remember the last time I read a review so scathing on TA...even games I think are bad or just don't like get good reviews or TA seems to at least try to point out the good points even if a majority thinks its bad. When TA straight up tells you not to buy a game...you KNOW that shit's bad. Thanks again.

  • Stetch

    I bought 1-3 on the spot ... Wow Im glad I didn't get all of them. This is complete shit. Avoid at all cost! Avoid even if free.

  • Daniel Schroeder

    Shaun must have defeated Heat Man to get his power, because this review is scalding.

    • Stetch

      For the right reasons ..

  • Nightxx

    I will buy mm3 since it was my first mm I played...

    • Stetch

      Dont ... really don't. Do not ruin your good memories ....

  • Dawn Stung atoms

    It makes the the guys who bought this game cry like anime fans on...

    ... oh wait, wrong game.

    • zergslayer69

      That one would be considered a masterpiece in comparison

    • Intendro

      Do you like awful ports that are awful? Then you gotta buy these games.
      And I know you like that bad frame rate action.
      "Wait, what?"

  • tex32

    Had been really looking forward to picking these up...any chance Capcom would update this after hearing what a disaster they have created? (Still can't fathom why they would release these in this state!)

    • zergslayer69

      I would bet it's a release and forget ordeal. Unless there's lots of DLC opportunities.

    • Ivan

      I was thinking that too. I'm hoping it gets horrible reviews, a ton of negative press and a mountain of refund requests. Maybe they'll see that and go back to the drawing board.

  • Derprozess

    Oh no! ๐Ÿ˜ฐ

  • Sick of Labour

    Good find, I can't believe the same people somehow managed to make something that ran at 60fps on my old iPhone 3G run at 30fps on my iPhone 6 Plus!

    There's no MFi support and the game runs in a tiny window on the iPad too.

    This thing is a total clusterfuck.

  • http://twitter.com/JaredTA Jared Nelson

    Beeline is the old name for Capcom's mobile division. It's simply Capcom Mobile now but you still see some references to Beeline at places and there are still games published under Beeline on the App Store (the first Mega Man 2 for instance). Under both names they've just been a division under Capcom. Ports like these are usually contracted out to 3rd party devs so it's very probable the team who ported MM2 back in the day aren't the same people who did these latest ones. In any case, it's completely on Capcom Mobile to ensure the ports were of higher quality than this, even if they likely didn't have anything to do with the technical aspect of it.

  • Mark

    Too bad - could have been a great precedent for porting some other classic platformers.

  • luigim64

    I guess you can say sister location wasn't the only thing released in the horror genre this week.

  • ZS77

    Wow. Just, wow. ๐Ÿ˜

  • zen_mode

    I know I should read this review. Or at least read the title. But I'm too excited, buying all six right away.

    • zen_mode

      Ha you guys fell for my ruse, for I did not purchase any!

  • Heinz da Baron Krauss von Espy

    gee. i remember someone here was pretty pre-maturely ejac ... elated about these mega mess. good thing i am skeptical about postings on t.a.

    • Shaun James Musgrave

      I can't find a single article where we didn't bring up poor past ports, express skepticism, or say that we were crossing our fingers that these would turn out okay. That qualifies as being so prematurely elated that you need to give us the stink-eye? Whatever blows your hair back, I guess.

    • korossyl

      Even if you feel you need sarcasm to make a point... your sarcasm has the inappropriate grossness and unnecessary crudeness of a child.

  • Duane Locsin

    Oh Capcom!

    ๐Ÿ˜

  • QuarterSwede

    The pathetic thing is that I could fire up sideloaded Provenance and play any Mega Man with great emulation and MFi support and that's being worked on by people in their free time. How could Capcom screw this up that badly!?

  • http://wizodd.tumblr.com Wizard of Odyssey

    So what does Capcom do with these? Do you suppose they'll sell anyway, based on the strength of the brand? Or will the word get out fast enough bot to bother? Will hey get pulled and redone, quietly updated, yanked from the store, or left up to hurt Capcom's reputation? Let's have an interview with the B team that made these!

    • korossyl

      Well... what was that horrific Molyneux game that TA gave an infamous one star to? Dungeon Keeper? They ended up pulling it and apologizing-not-apologizing for it. I think there's at least a chance this'll either get yanked or updated, based on this (and perhaps other) press.

    • OrangutanKungfu

      Oh, I would LOVE to see an interview with the Capcom devs who ported these games. True car-crash. Weirdly, I almost want to get one just to see how bad they are. But that flickering frame rate is painful even in videos.

  • s3xualchocolate1980

    Well thanks guys I won't waste my money. I will just keep playing them on my Xbox

  • http://wizodd.tumblr.com Wizard of Odyssey

    Shaun on Twitter:
    Capcom Mobile Team A: A l'il tuck and these ports of MHFU and AA5 are sound as a pound

    Capcom Mobile Team B: HOW I PORT FAMICOM GAEM

  • Dr T

    Disappointed but not surprised. The MM2 port years back started really poorly. At least it got updated to something worthwhile. I'll keep an eye out to see if they do update this to something better.

  • curtisrshideler

    I wasn't even that big of MM fan back when I had an NES, so I was going to invest in all of them eventually. Guess I'll wait a little longer to experience them. Thanks for the warning!

  • nkx

    Man I'm still disappointed! I would have bought every single game! Was a huge MM fan during the Super Nintendo days. I would be happy if these at least played like mega man x

  • Milotorou

    I guess ill keep my MM Legacy collection on 3ds then, thanks for making me save 10$, lol

  • Scape211

    I actually wondered if i just had rose colored glasses from my megaman days; maybe these had a bad frame rate (especially mm1) and I just remember it better or it looked better on an old CRT.

    Nope. Just watched someone playing it on youtube from 2013 and it was much smoother and just straight up better. A terrible shame. Dr Light must be rolling in his grave.

  • midgettosschamp

    Love it! A real strong recommendation that makes sense. Heard loud and clear Shaun, my purchase decisions on these games has been handed to you. These better not get more expensive and become the hydra-headed game of the year!

  • Intendro

    "Hey Mega Man! You're a little low on air!"

  • RLennon

    So, you're saying that I shouldn't hold my breath while waiting for Ghosts and Gobins mobile?

  • Dion Galbreath

    I'm curious at what the reviewer played this on. as i purchased all of them early this morning and happened to see this review from googles news site after the fact. feeling like i just wasted 12 bucks. i figured id try running one to see for myself. ran the first one on a iPad air 2, and there really isn't much slow down at all other then a very slight barely noticeable every once in a while. in fact id say some of the enemies shoot faster then they should have.. are you using a much older phone? or is it specific levels that i didn't play...

    • Intendro

      How about the animation frames?
      I watched a video of the first game's port and it's missing frames. Not smooth looking compared to the original.

    • Shaun James Musgrave

      I tested on an iPhone 6S Plus and an iPad Air 2. You are correct that some enemies shoot faster than they should, particularly if you set the game speed to fast. But it's not really running smoother, it's just increasing the speed of everything. The choppiness is still there, just less perceptible, and as a side effect, the timing of everything else is messed up.

      I know these games like the back of my hand. Heck, I just ran through the Legacy version Mega Man 2 on Tuesday for laughs. I play the original carts on my Famicom every month or two. I run a series of articles on a side blog analyzing games inspired by Mega Man. These are hands-down the worst ports of the games I've played, and it's not even close. And I'm certainly not the only one noticing it.

      If it's working well enough for you, I'm happy to hear that. Really-actually. Nobody should feel like they wasted their money. But that's also why I'm going to vigorously warn people away from these ports.

  • DotComCTO

    Best. Review. Ever! ๐Ÿ™‚

  • uberdan101

    I insta-bought 2 since it was my favorite. After playing through 2 stages I can honestly say that so far I don't understand all this hate.

    Are the games slower? Yes, but as capcom stated this is intentional so the touch controls can work well. Not all of us can carry a controller with us everywhere we go. I'm a teacher in an incredibly overcrowded public school. I don't have the capability to whoop out a controller when I have a free couple of minutes, but I can easily turn my phone sideways and squeeze in five minutes during lunch or whatever.

    Is the UI a bit awkward? Yes, it feels weird at first. The games come with multiple layout options, however, so you can switch around the controls to fit how you like them. Once you find one you like and take a few minutes to get used to them, they work incredibly well.

    Does it appear "choppy?" If you don't understand 8-bit gaming, yes. If you do, you realize that the reason these games didn't look choppy on NES is the speed hid the choppiness. With the games slowed down so the touch controls work, the choppiness becomes apparent. Oh darn. Why on Earth would that be a deal breaker?

    It seems to me that this review was not based on the released version of the game (the mere fact that the review of ALL SIX was posted just an hour or so after their release makes this even more obvious). I'm not sure if there was a beta or if the primary basis was the gameplay video, but when actually PLAYING the game the majority of these complaints, they simply aren't there. Are these ports the best way to play these games? Not at all, the old NES versions are definitely the best. Are these ports definitely good enough to play? Yes.

    • Nightxx

      My sentiment exactly...

  • DuckingGold

    There's been speculation among dedicated Mega Man fans that these ports are based on Japanese mobile versions of the game from the mid-2000s, which had dialed-back framerates to make them functional on more primitive phones, instead of the original NES code. There's no way to confirm that, but it's as good an explanation as any.

  • Booch138

    Hey, they released a wonderful 3DS Demons Crest port and in my book, they don't have to do a single thing to appease me further. Their Mega Man Collections on 3DS was great. I'll play that one. These do look miserable xD

    Maybe thats why they're so bad? Maybe they tried to post what they ported on the 3DS Hahahahahaha

  • Far_Out

    UNBELIEVABLE !! how could anyone blow it so BAD??

  • korkidog

    Mario Run is a great game with smooth gameplay. It's a shame that Capcom couldn't do the same with MegaMan. What a shame.

  • Alexythimia23

    Wow i think this is the worst rating for a game ive ever seen on ta!
    Sounds like its well deserved, so glad i didnt buy!

  • Shiro

    As someone who has every game on MULTIPLE platforms (Mega Man Anniversary Collection for PS2, Complete Works 1-6 PSOne Classics on Vita, Wii/Wii U/3DS Virtual Console, Legacy Collection on Steam)....and who also is in possession of one of the largest, most complete Mega Man MP3 collections on the net, I must say these are beyond disappointing.

    They aren't even PLAYABLE. Floaty collision checking, missing sound effects, and bad touch controls are just the start. The easy way to kill Yellow Devil in MM1 is all but gone.

    Don't buy them. Don't even DIGNIFY Crapcom with your money until they update these steaming piles of code.

    CAPCOM has once again proven that it cares nothing for one of its staple franchises. This takes the Blue Bomber's good name and drops it in a pile of shit. That pile of shit is your FUTURE, CAPCOM.

  • Nightxx

    These game definitely don't deserve a one star rating... no game does no matter how bad it is... aside from the low frames which I think was intended you're pretty much cherry picking things you didn't personally like that could be deems plausible by many.,.

    Anyway, your site lost its credibility a long time ago the way you oppress peoples opinions...

    • nkx

      You can't say TA is losing credibility when every other commentary bashed this game.

      • nkx

        Just to let you know I bought MM5 only because it's my fav of the original series. It's not great but playable if you have patience.

      • SeanTheHuman

        But why put up with that? If a game requires patience that it didn't once need, don't you think that's a sign of shit port?

    • scottsoapbox

      What's the point of a five star system if no game deserves one star??? Wait you're right. TA actually uses a six star system, but since no game deserves one star it just shows stars 2-6. So add one to all their ratings. Fixed it for you.

      • Nightxx

        You obviously have no idea... Please go check TA logs of 1-stars...

  • DuckingGold

    No stars would be more accurate,

  • scottsoapbox

    These games are proof that the TA backend needs to be updated to support a 1/2 star rating.

    • Milotorou

      ^ this

MEGA MAN MOBILE Reviewed by Shaun Musgrave on . Rating: 1