Corrupt A Wish - Forum Game

Granted but you have explosive diarrhoea after you stop using them

I wish I had an iPad

 

Granted, but it's actually your girlfriend's used pad.

I wish I had a pet eagle.

 

Granted, it died a second later

I wish I had a talking guinea pig that never dies

 

Granted, but it only speaks Swahili.

I wish I had a pet dinosaur.

 

Granted it died.

I wish I had an English speaking talking guinea pig that never dies

 

Granted, but it can only say: "Danny is Gay"

I wish Danny wasn't gay as well.

 

Don't start this
I'm not gay!

 

Guys chillll be chillllllll111lllll

 

We're chill as fuuuuuug man *exhales smoke*

 

Ok ok don't hit (on) me

 

Granted, but he's a brony, which is essentially the same thing.

I wish everyone had a sense of humor and didn't take things so seriously.

 

Granted but no one takes anything seriously, even if it's serious, resulting it nothing but slap happy morons.

I wish I could fly like that pig I just saw.

 

Granted, and like that pig you're fat, pink, ugly and have a squiggly tail.

I wish I felt no physical pain.

 

GOD DAMNIT

Granted but you feel nothing else either. Happiness, sexual attraction *cough*SJ*cough*

I wish I could eat anything without the consequences of health

 

Granted, but you shit ten times more often.

I wish I could eat candy without worrying about my teeth.

 

.. That's like exactly what I wished for..

Fine, but you shit 29 times more often than me.

 

I know, I couldn't think of anything else, lol.

I wish Miranda Kerr lived in my house, and slept with me every night.

 

True, but it's some fat middle aged man who was such a Miranda fan, that he had his name legally changed to hers.

I wish I got paid to live

 

Granted, but you get paid a penny every 20 years.