Beast Bound: Chock full of Classic RPGness

Clearly ramzarule's impeccable taste has shunned you all into silence.

There is no shame in it for I, too, found myself in a four day long coma of complete awe.

Are there none among you who would rise and pit your opinions against our reigning champ? None who dare to blur the line between opinion and fact? I KNOW everyone one of you "knows" what the best RPG is, but I need to hear it from you.

Is it obvious that I'm buying time? Probably is now that I've said as much, eh? And, if you haven't caught on by now, well that makes you a little bit of a special snowflake.

ANNOUNCEMENT: Test Flight is currently undergoing changes. Much like the caterpillar in the legally acquired cocoon, Test Flight is adapting to new ownership under Apple and we're waiting to see what changes (if any) we will need to make in order to successfully push a build to our patiently waiting audience. This is what we in the industry call a "convenient excuse". Write that down.

If you're sitting alone in your dark room waiting on Beast Bound to swoop down and finally fix everything that's wrong with your life, now might be a good time to start a new hobby. I hear old people need help with a lot of stuff, you might even see a little something of yourself in the past experiences of our aged citizenship, find some answers.

Seriously, does a stranger on the internet have to tell you to honor the elderly? Call your grandpa once in a while, he ain't gonna be around forever.

 

Hey, he can give up his livelihood for a doomed career in internet-comedy if he wants to! This is America!*

Jayzilla, we aren't officially accepting testers at the moment, but I hear SOMEONE'S private inbox on SOME SITE that we MAY OR MAY NOT BE ON RIGHT NOW is accepting messages from SOMEONE containing that very same SOMEONE'S device and email info, if you catch my drift. Quick pro-tip: Dialing "L" will only get you a condescending busy tone, I exclusively reply to summons via conch.

Also, I don't claim to have all the answers but I think, aconfusedkender, if the next time your sweet-peas start running amuck around the house, have them give Valentia a call to regale them with harrowing tales of yesteryear. And Valentia, if none of your tales qualify as harrowing, please feel free to lie; lying to children is an inalienable right that all elders should take liberal advantage of. I really feel like we're bringing hearts and minds together on this one.

*Everywhere on the internet is America. I don't see YOUR country's flag flapping in the e-breeze.

 

If you were worried about where you were going to get your Type 2 Diabetes in Beast Bound, worry not! Nanny Cups here has your ever expanding back!

 

I turn my back for a measly 5 days and, when I come back, ya'll let the bustling, ultra-interesting, magnificent and pristine Beast Bound topic slip without so much as a blurb?

It's not me, it's you.

I am as disappointed as this guy looks.



The only thing that could possibly console me at this point would be to share that we are revamping, polishing, and coddling our battle system into the ripe, mature mechanic that we hope to release with the game.

From the looks of this, I would say that maybe swords don't work so well on the rocky rube, our boy Rollem. CURIOUS.

 

Let it be known that no cartoon boy has ever been or ever will be as handsome as ramzarules.

Not everyone can make that claim, make sure you get it on your headstone.

 

Alright, jeez, just calm down. I know you're all clamoring for every sweet little update, but ya'll are like animals!

It's like almost every time I post, A WHOLE ONE OF YOU has to respond.

It's like tinnitus but for my whole body.

Against my better judgement, I'll give you an update, but please take it easy with the feedback, myself and the TA servers can only bear so much.

Let's all give a cautious, no-sudden-moves welcome to our first monster in the spotlight; the ever irritating Leerdrop!

These little weirdos covet butterballs (literal wads of butter) over all else. Well, they like stealing, too, 'cause... you know, they can't just get jobs and BUY butterballs.

We're also not sure where they're getting their scarves, but we can guess.

 

I think you might be onto something there, ramzarules. To be totally safe, you might want to destroy your phone and dye your hair (and your dog if you have one) a different color.

You just never know with these things.

Also thanks, lexicagames! As fellow purveyors of adventure titles we are tickled that this captures your interest <3

And we have not forgotten about you, aconfusedkender; your ever present gaze burns into us like the peeping stare of 1,000 voyeuristic suns. We know that you're out there, we can't help but feel it.

 

Go ahead and unhinge your jaws like the insatiable content-snakes that I know you are because I've got a shiny new treat to jam straight down your gaping maws!

What do you get when you cross a run of the mill weed with aggressive stupidity?

Why, this territorial little sucker right here! Meet Dewfus, he's the kind of guy who hangs out in the same spot everyday, taunting you with low-brow insults (maybe some superficial observations about what you are wearing) and, when you go over to politely ask him to stop, attacks you viciously.

You know the type.