Battle Bears NOPZ: Swag and Secrets (FINAL Door open) and A BIG ANNOUNCEMENT (pg 53)

CLOSE! But NOPZ has nothing to do with the Theatre Puget Sound systems.

I can see how you would arrive at this conclusion, but I think at least one of us is getting our acronyms crossed.

Also, look at this! I turn my back for three days and ya'll lose steam! This is UNNACCEPTABLE. I will make UNTRUE the fact that you are all safe behind your computer screens.

I see your every keystroke, I see your future.

GRIM.

Or awesome. It's all relative, as they say. You know what you're problem is? It's that you don't want it bad enough. Let me preface this with saying that, if I currently had the faculties, I WOULD totally draw a picture for the coming announcement to get my point THOROUGHLY across as I usually do. So do not underestimate the gravity of what I'm about to LAY DOWN just because I am doing so only in text format.

Some of you may have gleaned this from my overabundant knowledge receptacle (my brain). I just can't keep it in. Sometimes, when I know things, other people know them, too, just because my brain is SO FULL with the wisdom of the cosmos.

Here it isWAITASECOND-


- you should sit down first.

Okay.



In addition to some other things that are gonna make you feel so good you'll wanna kill yourself on the premise that you'll never feel that good again, the Golden Tickets are pretty much worth the price of NOPZ. Meaning, if you have a ticket, your money is no good to me. Meaning, if you've acquired a Golden Ticket YOU WON'T HAVE TO PAY FOR THE GAME.

Promocodes, my homies.

 

*o*

You guys are pimping it up SO HARD that I've begun to question whether or not I ever knew what it meant to pimp in the first place.

My booty phat freshness has been called into question.

Also, Imma let you guys have until MIDNIGHT TONIGHT (GMT -4 of course ;D) to get your submissions in and they will BE JUDGED ON THURSDAY.

Good DAY, sir and the one or two madam/s.

 

STOP THE INTERNET.

The submissions are in and IN YOUR GRILL.

BEHOLD:

Negamaki


Will090



aznriceboi13


deiden26


drelbs




minorpane


I am typing this to you from a good two feet to the left of my computer monitor for there is so much pimp that if i were to remain directly in the line of fire, I would come out as something unlike anything science has ever seen. No one has ever come back from an overexposure of pimp. Not as in "alive", they've literally been lost forever.

Seeing as half of our studio is carrying out their own interpritation of what it means to PIMP out at GDC in California, the three of us remaining shall BEGIN JUDGING and announce our winner in... oh, let's say a few hours ;D

Please scoot your soft cabooses to the edges of your seats and leave them there to be thoroughly blown away upon my return <3

 

THE RESULTS ARE IN.

To decide, I sat my compatriots down on a log suspended in a large vat of water. Water that was also acid and lazers. I casually strolled by said tank with large print outs of each submission. The first submission that caused either of my co-workers to tumble backwards to their deaths in a confused fit of laughter and immediate fear is the submission that would be deemed the most PIMP.

Negamaki came out of left field with a sincere homage to what is best in life: yours truly. It was a gesture that will not soon be forgotten and will inform my decision come December 2012 during The Great Sorting. Negamaki will always be a winner, Duke of New York A#1 The Bomb in my heart <3

aznriceboi13, to our delight, spent an inordinate amount of time cutting out and duplicating the huggables from my calendar image. A labor of love that I felt deeply in my nethers as it happened. If I were in my highschool math science class, that moment would have been the tensest moment of my life, fearing that the teacher would call me to the front allowing one and all to WITNESS my arousal.

deiden26's wish maker makes a decidedly stunning return with Oliver as an even ruggeder sunuvagun than he actually is (maybe even rivaling my OWN ruggedness). Had the contest been "Draw Oliver so rugged that, wherver he goes, there will always be freshly chainsawed wood and Lion Steaks on the grill (and in the grillz) then it would have been you that is a winner HANDSDOWN.

Then there was drelbs. It must be said that the mustache was a brilliant touch and I am severely disappointed that the others did not have such magnificent facial foliage. Then there was the ever confusing reference to something that I myself referenced without actually understanding what I was referencing. Considering my own personal tastes and the games I insist upon playing/helping to create, I was thoroughly delighted to be taken out of my comfort zone and unsettled to my very core with CONFUSION.

minorpane, if I had asked to see the most dazzling pecs this side of the Rio Grande, pecs so STUNNING that I would soil my pants and paradoxically ruin any pants I had yet to change into, you would not have disappointed. I never thought I would BEAR (AHAHAHAHAHAHA) witness to airborne, gilded Riggs Pectorals. Now I can die happy <3


Then along came Will090 with his two submissions. However much Oliver may have appreciated the width of the urine stream and all the implications that go with it, it was the deftly illustrated abs that took our love-cakes. Took them for the wildest ride. The abs, the sweet jeans, the explosion and the vague gold earings.

Pimping in simplicity.

All of the submissions elicited laughter in each of us in some capacity but i was those abs... Those abs have won us over.

I am happy to announce that Will090 has FLEXED his way through the wrinkles in my brains and come out on the other side with a rightfully deserved golden ticket.

Well done, everyone, well done indeed <3

 

Indeed.

It was a close one. It took us noless than 16 minutes, standing around, stroking our beards (and those without beards stroked mine) trying to decide.

It really was a close one. This next contest will have a CLEARER system of judgment, however.

This.
I.
Swear.

 

Today's contest is decidedly less strange.

I have a way about me. A way you all may have noticedNO, not that sexy fine vibe, that way that states "There's a man who really knows where hid towel is... he also looks a little like a procrastinating hippie"

I saw an opportunity to bring everyone a good time without a lot of work on my part AND I SEIZED IT. Consider this week a BREAK from weirdery and the bizarre.

Please, join me 24 seconds in the future and I'll tell you what the next contest is ;D

 

March 11th, 2010
TEST YOUR MIGHT.



This week calls upon the unfortunate masses (myself included) who have surrendered their privacy and comfort to facebook.

An even FREER version of Battle Bears FREE is available on FACEBOOK.

PLAY IT HERE: --> http://apps.facebook.com/battlebears_fb//?ref=nf
**EDIT** URL is currently down, us THIS ONE instead -->http://apps.facebook.com/dr_go_bears

This week's contest is pretty straight forward.
*Play the game until you can play no longer (it will be pretty obvious when that is).
*Take a screen capture of your score card and post it here.
*The person with the HIGHEST composite score (after we calculate Huggables killed multiplied by your accuracy percentage) gets themselves a Golden Ticket.

For those of you whose ADD has dropped you straight past the very simple and easily understood text, HAVE SOME PICTURES.

Either capture this:


Or, if you want to retain whatever shreds of anonymity you may still be clinging to, at LEAST capture this:


Por Example'. MY score would be 250.56 (261 x .96 = 250.56)

Don't even think about Shooping that whoop. I've seen quite a number of shops in my day and I can tell my looking at the pixels.

Anyone caught photoshopping will be receiving a visit from Candle Jack.

I swear to you, if you're caught cheating he w

 

COOL YOUR MEMES, PILGRIM.

I totally know you have a facebook. I know it with magic and cinnamon.

Prove to us that you're the best at facebook and that golden ticket is YOURS <3