Hello gentle readers, and welcome to the SwitchArcade Round-Up for June 24th, 2024. It’s another Monday, and since I spent my whole weekend playing through a clunky forty-year-old Japanese computer game, I can’t offer you up a bevy of reviews as I sometimes do. Instead, I have one review for you, covering said clunky game. Will the new releases save us? No, they will not. But we have one! Sales aren’t too bad at least, so that’s a little treat to end off on. Let’s get to work, shall we?
Reviews & Mini-Views
EGGCONSOLE Tritorn PC-8801 ($6.49)
Hey, we’ve finally got another EGGCONSOLE release that doesn’t require any Japanese language knowledge to play! It’s a shame the game itself is so very much of its era that most people are going to bounce off it, but we take our blessings where we can. Speakers of any language can… enjoy Tritorn equally. But do you want to? If you have an opinion on Hydlide, that will be surprisingly helpful towards answering that question. Tritorn is in a lot of ways Hydlide from the side. Sidelide. A ton of grinding against enemies that can kill you incredibly easily, a lot of opaque “puzzles" to solve, and virtually no story to speak of outside of the set-up and ending. Really not for everyone, or most.
Anyway, you’re the brave warrior Tritorn, and you’re tasked with the job of saving the island of Luwandia from the evil… Pay-Valusa. Sure, why not? You start your journey with little more than the sword in your hand and a small amount of magic balls you can throw to temporarily freeze enemies. Save them for emergencies; you won’t have a way to replenish them for quite a while. Tritorn is woefully inadequate for his task at the outset, as even a mild disagreement with a slime will put him six feet under. Abuse that EGGCONSOLE rewind feature. Abuse the save states. Take full advantage of every tool you’ve got, because the game never stops being able to kill you in two seconds if you let an enemy nudge up against you the wrong way.
Your first job is to grind a hundred slimes to reach the next level. You should also earn an item in the process, teaching you one way to get the things you need in this game: killing a bunch of one type of enemy. It is not the only way to get items, of course. You can also find some in chests, and a few others through some absolute nonsense. It’s not quite Druaga-level in this regard, but at least one required item is hidden behind an action you would never think to do. As you find items, you can explore more of the world, and I think I wouldn’t argue with much vigor against anyone who wants to call this a prototype Metroidvania. It’s just that every time you enter a new area, you have to stop and grind for a half hour. You can’t even abuse the fast-forward feature to make it more painless, because as I have said it is very easy for enemies to get the drop on you and murder you in two seconds.
Ultimately, I wasn’t able to finish Tritorn. I got to the last boss but I couldn’t find one of the necessary items to defeat him. With the relative obscurity of this particular version of the game (and the versions are somewhat different from each other), I couldn’t find my answer among Japanese players. So… everyone, please buy this and try to find that crown for me so I can finish it and delete it from my brain.
I don’t know why I get sucked into games like Tritorn, these Hydlide-likes, but I do. The controls are clunky, the gameplay is unpleasant, the tedium is real, and there is all kinds of pure foolishness standing between the player and the ending. And yet, here I am. Are you like me? This is where you need to be honest with yourself. If you have this same weakness to old, grindy games, you’ll get your money’s worth out of Tritorn. But I imagine most people will just find it annoying and quit playing after five minutes, despite there being no language barrier this time around.
Edit: I found the bloody crown! Demon exorcised, in more ways than one!
SwitchArcade Score: 3/5
Select New Releases
Lost Pixel ($4.99)
Such is the state of these summer Mondays that I will include this game just so that we have something in the new release section. I mean, at least it isn’t using crappy AI-generated art for its shop thumbnail? Anyway, you control a pixel and go through some pretty standard traps and hazards. The camera angle is skewed, and that’s about the fanciest trick it has up its sleeve.
Sales
(North American eShop, US Prices)
Some nice sales to start the week off with from folks like Team 17 and QUByte, plus some extra bits and bobs like Elderand, Dorfromantik, and Moon Dancer to spice things up. Not much in the outbox, but if you are craving the cloud version of Guardians of the Galaxy, it’s um… it’s sure there. Check those lists!
Select New Sales
Nekomin ($8.25 from $15.00 until 7/7)
Mustache in Hell ($2.49 from $4.99 until 7/11)
Racoo Venture ($9.74 from $14.99 until 7/11)
Bem Feito ($6.49 from $9.99 until 7/11)
Zero Tolerance Collection ($4.99 from $9.99 until 7/11)
VASARA Collection ($4.99 from $9.99 until 7/11)
VISCO Collection ($13.99 from $19.99 until 7/11)
Doomsday Hunters ($10.79 from $17.99 until 7/12)
GyroGunner ($5.76 from $7.20 until 7/12)
Shakedown Hawaii ($4.99 from $19.99 until 7/12)
Retro City Rampage ($4.99 from $14.99 until 7/12)
Viviette ($4.99 from $9.99 until 7/12)
Demon Turf ($12.49 from $24.99 until 7/12)
Star Gagnant ($22.80 from $38.00 until 7/12)
Witch Explorer ($9.99 from $19.99 until 7/12)
Elderand ($7.99 from $19.99 until 7/12)
CosmoPlayerZ ($7.69 from $10.99 until 7/12)
Dorfromantik ($11.99 from $14.99 until 7/12)
Moon Dancer ($13.29 from $18.99 until 7/12)
Metal Mind ($13.49 from $17.99 until 7/13)
Redden: 100denarii ($1.99 from $7.99 until 7/13)
ANIMUS: Revenant ($3.44 from $22.99 until 7/13)
Demong Hunter ($1.99 from $7.99 until 7/13)
Dungeon Limbus ($2.24 from $14.99 until 7/13)
Moving Out 2 ($14.99 from $29.99 until 7/14)
DREDGE ($16.24 from $24.99 until 7/14)
Neon Abyss ($4.99 from $19.99 until 7/14)
Blasphemous ($6.24 from $24.99 until 7/14)
Overcooked 2 ($6.24 from $24.99 until 7/14)
The Escapists 2 ($4.99 from $19.99 until 7/14)
Life of Slime ($3.49 from $4.99 until 7/14)
Knowledge Keeper ($3.49 from $4.99 until 7/14)
Re:Touring ($6.99 from $9.99 until 7/14)
Cybertrash STATYX ($6.99 from $9.99 until 7/14)
Cat & Ghostly Road ($5.99 from $9.99 until 7/14)
Time Traveler’s Guide to Past Delicacies ($2.49 from $4.99 until 7/14)
Edge of Reality ($2.49 from $4.99 until 7/14)
Fusion Paradox ($4.99 from $9.99 until 7/14)
Hero Survival ($2.49 from $4.99 until 7/14)
Earthshine ($2.49 from $4.99 until 7/14)
Stranded Deep ($12.49 from $24.99 until 7/14)
Sales Ending Tomorrow, June 25th
Alchemist Adventure ($2.79 from $19.99 until 6/25)
Broken Lines ($3.49 from $24.99 until 6/25)
Chasm: The Rift ($6.99 from $19.99 until 6/25)
Furi ($7.99 from $19.99 until 6/25)
Guardians of the Galaxy: Cloud Version ($14.99 from $59.99 until 6/25)
Haven ($9.99 from $24.99 until 6/25)
Hot Lap League Deluxe ($1.99 from $19.99 until 6/25)
Retro Machina ($2.79 from $19.99 until 6/25)
Slime Rancher Plortable ($9.99 from $24.99 until 6/25)
Squids Odyssey ($2.24 from $14.99 until 6/25)
The Long Dark ($17.49 from $34.99 until 6/25)
That’s all for today, friends. We’ll be back tomorrow with a more robust selection of new releases, plus more reviews and sales. Maybe some news, depending on how the world turns as I sleep. I really hope someone figures out how to find that stupid crown in Tritorn. I just want to beat Pay-Valusa and call it a job done. Oh well. I hope you all have a marvelous Monday, and as always, thanks for reading!
