Author Archives: Jonathan Glover


When I was a kid I had a jumping-jack toy that looked like a dancing cossack. He was a little wooden man with a pull-string dangling between his legs, and when you tugged on the string his arms would move up and down, as if he were jumping, or dancing. Every Christmas he’d get pinned to the coat closet, and I’d spend way too much time making him dance to the hummed tune of the Tetris theme (I was obviously not a very politically correct child, growing up on a farm in rural Virginia)...

Astronot [$1.99 / Free] is kind of ugly. Gameplay takes place in a tiny window framed by what looks like a Tiger LCD handheld casing, complete with chunky red virtual buttons and a colorful graphic featuring the game’s protagonist with an asterisk wedged squarely up his backside. Said protagonist and alien enemies are melted piles of pixels, reminiscent of something out of VVVVV held over a hot stove like your least favorite G.I. Joe. Oh, and those worms Eli And Brad mentioned in the video preview they put together? Yeah, they’re snakes, but look like frumpy, sad sock puppets...

'Inferno+' Review - Burning Ring of Fire

Inferno+ [$1.99], like its creator, Radiangames’ Luke Schneider, has a preoccupation with circles. It shows in the orbital whirl of your homing fire around the circular obstacles dotting the map. It’s also on display when rotating your ship down a tight passage, careening to ensure your Pac-Men drones aren’t swallowed by a swirling black hole. Inferno’s is a world of vortexes, globes and loops, and it wears its obsession like an Ouroboros tattoo. So, it’s appropriate that, if not his best, Inferno+ is Radiangames’ most well-rounded work...

Fernando Sanchez is Virtua Tennis Challenge’s [$4.99Rafael Nadal doppelgänger. So whimsically named after barely winning out against Brafael Nadalf in an interoffice poll, Bizarro Nadal quickly became my player of choice in the iOS version of Sega’s classic tennis series. Sanchez, like Virtua Tennis Challenge, is a pretty good facsimile of the real thing. He’s fast and has an incredible two-handed backhand, but he’s a facsimile all the same. A half-hearted attempt at greatness, poor Fernando’s Plasticine mullet and vacant zombie eyes are analogous to the lack of care Sega has given this, the newest entry in one of its most revered franchises...

'Score! Classic Goals' Review - World Class

If Flick Kick Football [$1.99] is a swirling Cristiano Ronaldo free kick, then Score! Classic Goals [Free] is a pinball machine Barcelona build-up: mechanical, sometimes even clinical, but with a deep understanding of The Beautiful Game and a potentially spectacular payoff...

The success of the digital version of a physical board game hinges on three things: the quality of the base game, the accuracy of the representation of said game and if both of these things are pulled off well enough to sustain a community long after you’ve tired of getting beaten by friends and family. With that in mind, is Scotland Yard [$4.99] a successful iOS port of a classic board game? No, but it could be...

Punch Hero's [Free] moment of brilliance occurs when it has you against the ropes. You’ll come to a point during the game’s eighteen-bout arcade mode where progression seems well-nigh impossible. Down to a trickle of health, you will think about throwing the towel in, taking an uppercut to the chin so you can earn some gold and turn the thing off...

Late last week The New York Times published an op-ed debate titled, “Hip, or About to Break a Hip,” a discussion about whether 45 year-old skaters are “embarrassing and risky or inspiring and life-affirming?” Opinions ranged from “inspiring and life-affirming,” to “... do something productive: become an ultimate fighter, get your G.E.D., date an 18-year old.” Um, wow, guys...